Tag Archives: Fear

Random Musings: LOVE is FREEDOM

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A Moment of Transparency: While I am a very open person I do not feel compelled to share all of me with everyone. Yes, I just want to be “Naked” but only before those that can appreciate the gift, power, & level of responsibility that relating in that state brings.

I have no desire to be liked or understood by everyone. No compulsion to fit in or be accepted by the masses. I genuinely like who I am as a person and I am okay with the areas in which I am still growing and learning.

Deeper connections for me honestly don’t happen very often but when they do it happens organically. Sometimes an interaction with another person strikes a chord in me and I feel inspired to explore the essence of who they are more deeply or it feels as if I have known them since forever, it feels like going home.

For Me caring & loving doesn’t mean owning. It does not give me exclusive rights to your heart, mind, body, or soul. It however does allow me the opportunity to share those beautiful parts of you in whatever way you wish to share them with me. It allows me to view the world through your eyes, to feel, to see, to hear things in a way that only you can and to savor that expression.

I do not want to hoard you or hide you away from the world. I want my presence to be Freeing and for it to wrap you in a blanket of comfort so warm and secure that it encourages and inspires you to LIVE and be the most Authentic Version of yourself that you can.

I want you to experience all the things that your spirit desires on this journey unencumbered by the limiting and sometimes suffocating effects of controlling insecurity that many have labeled as LOVE.” ~ from the heart of Twin Spirit

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Random Musing: Freedom of Forgiveness

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“Recently I had the opportunity of a lifetime presented to me. The chance to let someone who hurt me very deeply “have it” in a way that I had been unable to give it to them in the past because I was to wounded. My chance had arrived to hurt them as badly as I had been hurt. I had all of the awful things I wanted to say & do all planned out and I was ready to pounce like a hungry lion in the jungle who hadn’t eaten for weeks.
 
Then a funny thing happened…when the moment arrived things did not play out as I planned. We argued a bit, we disagreed, we debated, and then we just talked. We talked more openly and honestly than we ever have before.
 
The amazing thing that happened during this interaction is that all of my pain and resentment began to melt away and I began to see something that I never had before…that in ways I had shut them out too.
 
Not being fully authentic & completely me and attempting to only present the parts of me that I thought they would accept and love was just as dishonest and hurtful to them as the things they did to me. We were both responsible for the current state of our relationship.
 
There were no victims, only 2 people both afraid that they were not “good enough” just as they are. Two people functioning with played out internal scripts & immature ways of connecting that no longer served them. Two people hiding behind forced smiles & cool unconcern. Never wanting to be the one who cared too much but deeply thirsty for real love and genuine appreciation. Dying to be accepted just as we are but too scared to trust that the other would accept us and also not extending that same acceptance to the other.
 
It is amazing the power that genuine understanding and forgiveness have to instantly transform. Letting go of the pain freed me & them. Giving us the opportunity to benefit from the greatest gift that it brings…PEACE!” ~ Twin Spirit
 
Feel free to read more of my Random Musings on my blog: http://www.Mybeautifuluglyworld.wordpress.com

Random Musings: The Walls We Build….

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“It’s oftentimes not that we think you are him (or any other that has hurt us previously). It is the pain or disappointment you are delivering currently that causes us to pull away and begin construction on our walls. We are often saving ourselves from You not hiding from him.

Inconsistency, dishonesty (to yourself & us), lack of follow through, infidelity, unreliability, selfishness, being emotionally cold or unavailable, lack of care and appreciation, no communication, being irresponsible, shutting us down and out often, always placing us last on your list of priorities, refusal to spend time or invest in the relationship, mind games, constant insecurity & jealously, low or no ambition, lack of affection, sexual unfulfillment, disrespect, unkindness… these types of things presented to us over and over again during the course of our interaction with you, show us that we should not & cannot depend on you or trust you with our hearts.

Some women are wounded and won’t let you in or punish you because of mistakes of lovers past, but many more of us, even after being hurt badly before still decide to trust & open our hearts to love again…

You must understand the powerful importance of a woman truly letting you in. Her opening the door to the most vulnerable parts of herself emotionally, mentally, physically & spiritually. It is an act of trust, a surrendering. It is a gift and one you should not awaken, accept, or receive if you cannot, do not, or have not the desire or capacity to protect her heart, nurture her spirit, appreciate her essence , or reciprocate the love. It is selfish and abusive to do otherwise.” ~ shared from my heart with loving intentions, Twin Spirit 💕

Random Musings: This Time…I Choose Me

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LOVE Me Boldly!
No timid intentions.
Let your actions speak loudly the desires of your heart.
Uncertainty breeds insecurity, so
if you want me, then show me.
If you’re unsure, that’s fine you see
Just please step aside, because
I Choose Me.” – TwinSpirit

Random Musings: Love Me Boldly!

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“LOVE Me Boldly!
No timid intentions.
Let your actions speak loudly the desires of your heart.
Uncertainty breeds insecurity, so
if you want me, come and get me.
I desire a partner who compels my strength and
who is not afraid to love me
laugh with me
cry with me
move me
grow with me
be open with me
inspire me
want me
need me
take risk with me
who will stay when life gets messy.
A partner who will challenge me to ask questions, go deeper, & push harder
Who will hold me accountable for my own happiness and join me in creating the life of our Dreams….
One who will allow me to LOVE him boldly too.” – Twin Spirit

Random Musings: I AM Many Things….

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YES beautiful people I am still a music artist and I still sing – It always makes me giggle and surprises me when people as me that- (A new project is in the works even as we speak – I just have to let a little life happen to be inspired to create new things) ~

I AM Twin Spirit & I Creatively Express the Spirit of Me in Many Many Ways!!

I create MUSIC: www.epresskitz.com/TwinSpirit
I love to write & share my Random Musings..so I blog: www.MyBeautifulUglyWorld.wordpress.com
I create wearable ART: www.ChoozLove.com
I love/sell recycled fashions: Fave platforms www.ThriftyGirlsRock.com & The Frugal Stop – Pop Up Shop
I love to support other Artist, so I partner with The SOFA Series: www.TheSofaSeries.com
I love to inspire Artist & small Art/Entertainment based businesses to grow so I provide consulting & administrative services: www.YuckWork.com

My Creative Self Expression is not limited to One Medium, One Form, One Experience, or One Platform. I Morph, Shift, Change, Expand, & Flow as I move through each and every moment. I want to experience all that this life has to offer…so I love hard, play hard, work hard, & relax as much as I desire. I try it all on for size. If inspired I MOVE. Labels, boxes, & expectations do not define me. ONLY the Callings of My Heart & Soul Mold the path that I chose to walk on this journey we call “LIFE”.

Shared with Love,
TwinSpirit

Random Musings: I Awaken by TwinSpirit

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  1. “I thought I was angry at you
    for letting me down and leading me on.

    I thought I had every right to be feeling
    as I do.

    I blamed you for all of the hurt & pain
    for your aloofness & detachment,
    for my disappointment & tears.

    Then in the silence of a single moment
    it came to me,

    I realized that not once had you ever promised me anything.
    Not once did you ever say it would be forever.
    Not once did you commit to always. Not once did you ask me for my heart or devotion.

    I gave my everything to you in hopes that in it you would find value and in return would give your everything to me.

    I had in fact built a future for “WE” constructed solely on the desires of “ME”.

    The truth is I had in fact been the selfish one. Holding you hostage to the unrevealed expectations in my mind.

    You simply enjoyed the present moments that we shared. While I was so fixated on the future could be’s I missed out on the beautiful nows that you gifted me with regularly.

    I never appreciated all that you did do, as I was so focused on what I felt you didn’t. Imaginary shortcomings created by me.

    So blinded by my overly romantic colored visions filled with grandiose gestures of undying love that I had allowed myself to believe must happen to paint the perfect picture of future forever love, I could not see clearly the simplistic beauty of a man giving me his heart via his presence in the present. Sharing his soul in the way that he could right now.”

    – I Awaken by TwinSpirit © Beautiful Ugly Publishing 2014